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Certainly, you know what playlist to blast when you want to make a baby, but do you know which sex position is best to get pregnant? Given that most birds and bees talks narrow in on how to avoid pregnancy, the odds are that you don’t know which position is most likely to help you conceive. Heck, at no fault of your own, unless you’ve actively sought out research on your own time, chances are you don’t know any best practices for conception.
To help fill these gaps in knowledge, we asked fertility specialists and sex therapists to help us put together this complete crib sheet (pun intended) on sex and conception. See more below to get the answers you need.
Here’s what the research says
Bluntly, research doesn’t have much of anything to say about sex positions and conception. “There is no scientifically proven sexual position that has been proven to increase pregnancy outcomes over other positions,” says Kecia Gaither, MD, MPH, FACOG, double board-certified OB/GYN and maternal-fetal medicine physician, Director of Perinatal Services at NYC Health + Hospitals/Lincoln.
In part, this is because gathering data about the best sex positions for pregnancy is as hard as, well, morning wood. Most couples move through multiple sex positions per single-sex session, after all. But mostly, this is because “there are so many other factors that impact the likelihood of conception, such as overall fertility, timing in the menstrual cycle, sperm quality, and egg health,” says certified sex therapist and licensed psychologist Rachel Needle, PsyD with the Center for Marital and Sexual Health of South Florida.
To be sure, the only kind of sex that can result in pregnancy is penile-vaginal intercourse, says Dr. Needle. FYI, positions that allow for deeper penetration may be the way to go, though (more on this later). Specifically, P-in-V intercourse wherein ejaculation occurs inside the vagina, she says. Hand sex, anal sex, oral sex, and mutual masturbation may all also result in penile ejaculation, but because the ejaculation does not occur directly inside the vaginal canal, pregnancy won’t occur.
Dr. Needle explains that “conception can only occur when sperm (the male reproductive cell) fertilizes an egg (the female reproductive cell).” When it occurs without the help of assisted reproductive technologies (ART), this happens after penile ejaculation inside a vagina. “The sperm swim up to the fallopian tube, meet and fertilize an egg, creating a zygote that then travels to the uterus where it implants in the uterine lining, starting pregnancy,” she explains.
What else to do to make conception easier
If you’re trying to conceive, your time would be much better spent figuring out when you’re going to have vaginal intercourse than how you have it, according to board-certified OB/GYN Sherry Ross M.D., FACOG and author of She-ology and She-ology, the She-quel.
Read on to learn the best time to have sex—plus three other strategies that may support conception.
1. Schedule sex during your ovulatory window
If you want to go at it like bunnies throughout the month, have at it—but that isn’t necessarily going to bump up your odds of winding up with a baby.
“The only time of the month a [vulva-owner] can get pregnant is the ovulation window, which is the period inclusive of the five days before ovulating, the day of ovulation, and a day after ovulation,” explains Debra Laino, an AASECT-certified sex educator, board-certified clinical sexologist, life coach, and relationship therapist based in Delaware.
During ovulation, which happens at the mid-point in the menstrual cycle, a mature egg is released from the ovaries, explains Dr. Ross. Once the descended egg reaches the fallopian tubes, it is available to be fertilized by sperm for up to 24 hours, she says. Sperm, however, can live in the female reproductive tract for up to five days after ejaculation, she adds. So, if living sperm are present in the fallopian tubes at the time of the egg release (ovulation), conception is possible.
How can you use this info to increase the odds of conception? Board-certified OB/GYN Melanie Bone, MD, the U.S. medical director at the virtual women’s health clinic Daye suggests tracking ovulation with a pregnancy or fertility tracker app, using ovulation predictor kits, and paying attention to changes in your cervical mucus and basal body temperature, which can help identify the most fertile days of your cycle. “Having intercourse during these fertile days significantly increases your chances of conception,” she explains.
2. Consider positions that enable deeper penetration
If you enjoy positions that allow for deeper penetration (think: doggy style, lifted missionary, cowgirl), then Dr. Ross recommends opting for those.
These haven’t been scientifically proven to increase the odds of conception. But “positions that allow for deeper penetration ensure the sperm is deposited closer to the cervix, which might give them the best chance of swimming to the fallopian tubes where fertilization takes place,” she says.
If, for whatever reason, you and your partner prefer another vaginal sex position, however, don’t feel like you need to rejigger your sex routine. “Sperm are capable of traveling through the female reproductive tract regardless of the penetration depth,” says Dr. Bone.
3. Lay around after making love
Resist the urge to hop out of bed to shower or clean your pleasure aids after sex, and instead, get the most of those precious post-sex minutes. Many healthcare providers recommend lying down on your back after intercourse with a pillow under your hips for 20 to 30 minutes, according to Dr. Laino. “This is thought to support the sperm as they travel up to the fallopian tubes quicker due to gravity,” she explains.
If you can orgasm from this position, Dr. Ross suggests it. “Having an orgasm will also help propel sperm in the right direction,” she says.
4. Be patient with yourself and your partner
“If you are eager to become pregnant, it’s natural to feel a mix of excitement and frustration, especially if it’s taking longer than expected,” says Dr. Needle. If you start feeling impatient, she suggests focusing on what you can control. “Taking small steps to optimize your health, like eating a balanced diet, staying active, managing stress, and tracking your ovulation, can help you feel more in control during this process,” she adds.
What you should avoid if you want to conceive
Hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the sex and post-sex practices that served you well when you weren’t trying to conceive could be cock-blocking conception now.
1. Your go-to lubricant
Your go-to slippery stuff needs to be swapped out for one with a fertility-friendly formula. The consistency of oil- and silicone-based lubricants can interfere with the motility of the sperm and negatively affect the chance of getting pregnant, says Dr. Ross. Meanwhile, “lubricants of any base that contain fragrances, flavorings, petroleum, propylene glycol, glycerin, parabens, nonoxynol-9, and chlorhexidine should also be avoided when trying to conceive,” she says. (FWIW: Experts suggest avoiding these lube ingredients no matter what).
The good news is you don’t have to forgo lubrication entirely when you’re trying to get pregnant. “There are lubricants specifically formulated to be ‘fertility-friendly’ lubricants, which have been tested to ensure they don’t negatively impact sperm function,” says Dr. Bone. Both Pre-Seed Fertility Lubricant and Conceive Plus Fertility Lubricant are lubes that have been previously recommended to Well+Good for those trying to conceive.
2. Peeing immediately after sex
If you’re prone to urinary tract infections, this is going to go against everything you’ve ever been told: postpone peeing after sex for half an hour. While peeing itself won’t decrease your likelihood of conceiving, “it does interrupt the recommended 30 minutes of lying down time after sex, which may help the sperm to swim up into the fallopian tubes where conception occurs,” says Dr. Ross.
That said, don’t beat yourself if you have to go. “Sperm are capable of traveling to the fallopian tubes within minutes of ejaculation,” says Dr. Bone. So hopping right out of bed to pee—or do anything else—won’t totally squash the likelihood of a successful conception, she says.
3. Going at it alone
“Conception is a complex process, and even for healthy couples, it is normal for conception to take several months,” says Dr. Bone. But if you’re under 35 and have been trying for a year without success or over 35 and trying for over six months, she suggests consulting with a fertility specialist. The right expert will be able to diagnose why you haven’t been successful thus far and offer solutions to help you meet your baby-making goal.
The bottom line
Of all of the factors that impact fertility—e.g., overall health, age, and the menstrual cycle phase—the position(s) you get down and dirty in really isn’t one of them. While experts do think that deeper penetration can be helpful, what’s most important is to use sex positions that you are comfortable with. That’s why experts suggest relying on a fertility specialist rather than a specific sex position rotation if you want pregnancy to be on your horizons.
So, consider this your green light to go at it in whatever positions are the most fun and pleasurable. As a bonus, actually enjoying the sex position you use while trying to conceive will help reduce stress and can increase your chances of conception by reducing stress and enhancing arousal. Oooh baby, indeed!