You’re Not Lazy, You’re Probably Just Overstimulated

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Even if you’ve never known what to call it, chances are, you’ve been overstimulated. In fact, one survey found that 82% of Americans have felt overstimulation at some point in their lives. It might be stepping into a party and feeling instantly frazzled by the many things vying for your attention: the pumping music, strangers, friends, food, and lights. Or, it’s the snap decision to turn off the television simply because there’s too much going on—the baby wants to be held, the kitchen exhaust is running, and the neighbor’s dogs are having a bark-off with your pups. ‘I just can’t handle it right now,” you say.

Every day, your body receives a wealth of sensory information, picked up by the five senses of sound, sight, touch, smell or taste. The info is relayed to your brain and nervous system, where it is processed, so the appropriate responses can be carried out. But sometimes when it’s all too much and you’re feeling overstimulated, the only thing you want is to shut down and do nothing. Sound familiar?

However, there’s actually a clinical term for what you’re feeling. Sensory overload “is what we all experience when we have too much sensory information coming in,” says April Snow, LMFT, a marriage and family therapist based in California who works with highly sensitive and introverted people. When the sensory input coming in exceeds what your nervous system can process, the nervous system misinterprets it as a threat, and this can push it into hyperarousal (fight or flight) or hypoarousal (freeze), Snow explains (more on this later).

Thankfully, with the right strategies, we can learn to regulate and manage the effects of sensory overload, says Caitlin Slavens, MC, R Psych, a Canada-based registered psychologist who works regularly with parents experiencing overstimulation. Here, our expert therapists explain more information about sensory overload and share tips on managing overstimulation.

What causes sensory overload?

“If you’re already experiencing anxiety, depression, grief, or going through a lot of stress, you’re more likely to experience sensory overload because your nervous system is already taxed,” says Slavens. And, Snow explains the bucket as being nearly empty, so the nervous system is left scrambling, trying to regulate itself with minimal reserves. In other words, when you already have enough on your plate, there’s only so much more you can handle.

Sensory overload can happen for a wealth of reasons. For example, managing the incoming sensory information is also trickier for your nervous system when you’re feeling sick, hungry, thirsty, tired, or lacking restful sleep. But, that’s not all.

“Then there are people who are just more naturally susceptible at a baseline,” says Snow. “Like folks who are highly sensitive, on the spectrum, have attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), or have sensory processing disorder, where their brains are taking in sensory information differently.” Snow adds that people with a history of long-term trauma may also not be able to regulate their senses well, which could increase their risk of feeling overstimulated more often.

How to tell if you’re overstimulated

When your nervous system is overstimulated, it’s either going to pop up into fight or flight mode or freeze. Fight or flight is a stress response where your body decides it will either confront a threat head-on or escape it altogether. Freeze, on the other hand, occurs when your body feels stuck, stiff, or well, frozen when faced with a stressor. Snow explains that “we often cycle between the two stress responses.”

When you’re in fight or flight, you may experience:

But when you’re in the freeze response, you may feel:

  • Lethargic or lazy
  • Sad
  • Numb
  • Shut down
  • Trouble concentrating
  • Difficulty making decisions and completing actions

“When you’re in these stress states where your nervous system is dysregulated, your prefrontal cortex, the front part of your brain, goes offline, and with it goes your executive functioning,” explains Snow. “It becomes hard to think clearly, it’s hard to make decisions, it’s hard to focus. And when we’re in those states, it’s also hard to sleep,” she adds.

So, what can you do to keep calm?

When you’re experiencing sensory overload, it can often feel like there’s nothing you can do to stop feeling overwhelmed. But, we’re here to tell you there is a way to feel calm. Here are some of our favorite expert-approved strategies to try when we’re overstimulated.

Tell yourself that you are safe

Talking to yourself may seem odd to some people, but from my experience, it works and is an effective way for me to self-soothe. Slavens agrees, and here’s why. Say you’re looking after toddlers who are crying because you’ve told them they only have five minutes left of outside play. By reminding your nervous system that you’re safe, the nervous system takes its foot off the “threat” pedal, easing away from that fight, flight, or freeze response it was in.

Focus on other surroundings

This tip is especially handy when you’re unable to get away from the overstimulating object or environment that’s causing the sensory overload. Try this: turn your head, look all the way to your left, then all the way to the right. What you’re aiming to do is take in more of the space, instead of locking your gaze and attention on what your nervous system has perceived as a threat, says Snow. It helps you paint a bigger picture of safety so your brain and nervous system can start to feel some sense of calm.

Slow down what you’re doing, even if it’s by a fraction

We know our to-do lists are never-ending. But instead of rushing through your action items for the day, let yourself slow down. In slowing things down, you’re giving your nervous system room to process the sensory information it has already received, so that it is primed to take in whatever information is going to be coming at your next. “My clients are always surprised by this, it sounds so simple, but it’s effective,” Snow says.

Separate yourself from the overstimulating environment 

“If you need to take a sensory break, take that break,” says Slavens. Spend a couple of minutes on your own in a bathroom, empty room, or in the garden. By “giving your senses a break, you’re allowing your nervous system to settle, and your mind to catch up with processing for a moment,” says Snow.

Mothers often say they feel “touched out” and wonder if it’s fine to take a break from holding their young kids. Slavens, who has children of her own, says yes, it is. It’s okay to put a baby down for a couple of minutes in a safe place while you take a sensory break in the nearby room. It’s okay to say to your kids, “Mom’s body needs some space right now, so you can sit beside me, but you can’t sit on me.”

We know you’ve probably heard the oxygen mask on the airplane analogy a bunch of times, but the sentiment behind it is true—take care of yourself before you’re unable to take care of anyone else.

Practice mindful breathing

Adding some mindful breathing exercises can help reduce stress and soothe your nervous system when it is overloaded, our experts say. Breathe in through your nose and sigh out through your mouth. We like to try box breathing, where you breathe in for four counts, hold it for four counts, breathe out for four counts, hold it for four counts, and repeat it as many times as you need.

Engage in bilateral movement

Left-to-right or side-to-side movement, also known as bilateral movement, has the effect of “waking up the brain and allowing it to process” the information it is picking up, says Snow.

Going on a walk is a form of bilateral movement. If you’re standing and chatting with people at an event, it could be gently shifting your weight between your feet from left to right. If you’re at a meeting or a dinner, it could be tapping your hands on your thighs back and forth under the table. Whichever bilateral movement you choose, engaging in it can bring your awareness back to your body and away from the information that’s overstimulating you.

Apply pressure to your body

“Pressure on the abdomen is really comforting to most people’s nervous systems,” say Snow. She recommends taking your hands and pressing them on the lower belly, pulling your knees up to your chest, or hugging yourself. You can also apply deep pressure on your chest using your hands, or place something weighted on your body, such as a weighted blanket or your furry friend, Slavens adds.

For an added bonus, try combining the techniques we’ve already mentioned. For example, put your hands on your chest to give yourself some deep pressure, practice breathing, and tell yourself, “I’m safe.” Having a variety of these management techniques in your back pocket is ideal, so you can shuffle between them if one starts to lose its effectiveness after a while.

When to see a healthcare provider

While these management strategies we just discussed are excellent ways to calm your nervous system down when you’re feeling overstimulated, sometimes they may not be enough. If your sensory overload symptoms are interfering with your day-to-day functioning, hindering you from doing the things you want to do, or happening regularly, experts encourage you to reach out to your healthcare provider. They can learn more about your experiences, test you for underlying health conditions, and connect you to a mental health professional to provide you with additional support.

The bottom line

Everyone experiences some type of overstimulation at some point in their lives. And as frustrating as sensory overload can be, it’s also just our body’s way of telling us that our nervous system is reaching its maximum capacity to process information. While it’s not easy to shield ourselves completely from overstimulating environments, thankfully, there are tried-and-true methods to help keep our minds and bodies calm. So the next time things feel just a bit too much, there are strategies you can use to feel a little more at ease.